Whimsical Survivalist T-Shirts

'Billy, no offense, but i'm tired of playing bumper rafts.'

'Me, I don't spend my pocket money: I hoard it...'

"Snow White! It's the dancing, singing woodland creatures wondering if you want to go down the pub."

"Right here's fine."

'I'd like two pizzas, one with cheese and pepperoni and the other with cheese and sausage. One more thing, do you deliver?'

Trojan Hurdler.

' Get ready to make a wish.'

'I need a life saving app. I need a life saving app.'

''Now we're the only yard in the block with a blue apple tree!'

'Oh, look - a juggling stilt-walker painting that little child's face!'

"I see you also took the road less travelled!"

Fellow Sheep of the Ring

"Now that's a great number if you want to be protected from the entire environment."

Teddy Bear

"Sold For sale Ellie Kopp 1-800-238-7463 Yaffle Realty Stop renting. Buy your boot from a boot."

King flicking out his tongue to catch a fly.

"Yes, we're stranded here... but think how healthier we are eating nothing but fish!"

Woman throwing giant pot.

'You always wanted a larger office with a view.'

"Will you be flying through to Toledo, or attempting to leave mid-air?"

'The guy who made me is a fan of Magritte.'

"I don't know, what do you want to do today?"

What's your contingency plan, Randy? My what? If a calamity of biblical proportions were to strike here in Canardville, would you flee across the bridge to Candorville? Or would you search in vain for a fallout-resistant bunker, before surrendering to the cruel inevitability of your demise? I ask just for the sake of discussion. No reason to panic. Totally unrelated: I just found out someone who's definitely not me is selling fallout bunkers at buy-this-now-if-you-want-to-live.com. Very bad man.

'You are here' sign on desert island.

The ambush.

Soap recovery Ship in bath

"What, no day spa? And you call this a luxury bunker."

Through the Looking Glass - Alice Rows the Sheep.

Drawing on an island.

Cat Knitting a Tapestry

'Get me the coast.'

Man looks worried, as his fellow castaway reads book: 'Cannibalism for Dummies'.

Cat chess

'Have you got anything for late onset whimsy?'

"Scotch and water, *hic* scotch and water..."