Western Lovers Gifts

'Twinhawk was a mean, bloodthirsty town'

"Whataya mean the two of us? This town ain't big enough for nobody."

"I still plan to be a cowboy when I grow up. If I'm going to service my share of the national debt, I might as well have fun doing it."

"Smile when you say that, pardner."

'Awright...Who's the dirty, lowdown varmint who's copyin' my plaid-shirt-and-stone-wash-jeans-with-matching-boots-and-vest ensemble?'

"I'd say this pair of sixes beats your hand."

Dawing your Cellphone

L'il Buckaroo on Board.

"I'll tell ya what we don't need is some Dr. Durango helping us with a dang snake bite."

"Them's cat-fightin' words, Arlin!"

"Give him time, - if anyone can break that swing set, it's O'l Tex."

Butterfly herders of the wild west.

"Skate or die."

Non-violent Western (Cowboys with water pistols).

"You're right -- this town is big enough for the both of us."

Opera Singer Looking Out of Place Sitting On The Bar Piano

"They tell me you're a man who has True Magritte."

'Hold on there Jethro! You know I don't tolerate that kind of horseplay in this joint.'

"Mom, Dad - I'm a sidekick. I've always been a sidekick. And I want you to know that I have a pardner."

"Kid!! We know you're in there!!! Either come out or commence to fightin'!!!!"

'I always thought a dogfight was a lot of snarling and walking around stiff-legged.'

Cowboy directions 'Up yonder', 'Down yonder', 'This-A-Way' and 'That-A-Way'.

Louis L'Amour hones his craft.

"'City Slickers' was O.K., but, let's face it, it was no 'Claire's Knee.'"

"....and some apple pie for dessert...oh miss, remember that a la mode!"

"Billy the kiddy!"

"Say, you were right, Sheriff, this is the best way to keep up with the 'Space-Hopper Gang'."

"I guess there ain't room in this town for two bonsai specialists."

L'il Buckaroo on Board.

"I'm just gonna reach in my back pocket real slow-like and turn off my ringer."

"It is just as the Oracle foretold!"

Cowboy at mechanic with horse hoisted

'Man! I wish I'd finished college.'

Wild West Text Showdown

'The autopsy revealed he was indeed a yellow-bellied, lily-livered varmint!'