Western Lore Enthusiasts Gifts

'Not hard to trail the Poor Hygiene Kid.'

"I still plan to be a cowboy when I grow up. If I'm going to service my share of the national debt, I might as well have fun doing it."

'Awright...Who's the dirty, lowdown varmint who's copyin' my plaid-shirt-and-stone-wash-jeans-with-matching-boots-and-vest ensemble?'

L'il Buckaroo on Board.

Dawing your Cellphone

"I'll tell ya what we don't need is some Dr. Durango helping us with a dang snake bite."

"Them's cat-fightin' words, Arlin!"

"He was the one everyone called 'The Greatest.' Then one day, a stranger turned up in town."

Butterfly herders of the wild west.

Non-violent Western (Cowboys with water pistols).

"You're right -- this town is big enough for the both of us."

'Hold on there Jethro! You know I don't tolerate that kind of horseplay in this joint.'

"Mom, Dad - I'm a sidekick. I've always been a sidekick. And I want you to know that I have a pardner."

"Kid!! We know you're in there!!! Either come out or commence to fightin'!!!!"

'I always thought a dogfight was a lot of snarling and walking around stiff-legged.'

"They tell me you're a man who has True Magritte."

Cowboy directions 'Up yonder', 'Down yonder', 'This-A-Way' and 'That-A-Way'.

"I'm just gonna reach in my back pocket real slow-like and turn off my ringer."

Cowboy at mechanic with horse hoisted

Louis L'Amour hones his craft.

"I believe I you, Bigfoot."

"'City Slickers' was O.K., but, let's face it, it was no 'Claire's Knee.'"

"....and some apple pie for dessert...oh miss, remember that a la mode!"

"It is just as the Oracle foretold!"

"I guess there ain't room in this town for two bonsai specialists."

A dog dressed as a cowboy leans against a sign that reads "Armed response".

'The autopsy revealed he was indeed a yellow-bellied, lily-livered varmint!'

Wild West Text Showdown

"Things get more interesting at noon."

Lee Van Cleef

"We could have a shoot-out, then brunch."

'Just a trim for me thanks.'

CW 'Text' Yomp Sidekicks: Attorneys-at-law,

'You dirty, snivelling, low down, arrogant son of a gin-swilling kleptomaniac.'

'Run really fast toward the cactus and then just stop. It freaks them out.'