Wellness Seekers Gifts

Safe Tanning Salon.

"I spend my day prepping for a good night"

'Let me through, I'm at Doctor.com.'

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

"Today we'll be performing some much needed maintenance on Miss Trimbles weak pelvic floor."

Institute of Health next to Alternative medicine dept

'He taught me the importance of taking a walk each day.'

'It was at this point that the executive group began its hatha flow retreats.'

'Our health-care system - eat organically.'

Exercise Bars

"My wife says she wants you to make me fit for purpose."

Stopping smoking at work had given Tim the energy to explore his creativity ... 'And I like to call this my dance of the fourth quarters 'profit and loss' account.'

'Good news! Throwing yourself at the mercy of the cholesterol seems to have worked.'

"Looks like your Yang is on the move again."

'Do you think I need to eat less. Do you have a book you could recommend to tell me how?'

"I said remember those extra years we added to our lives by good clean livin'?"

"That's good. Now extend the fingers and lose the attitude."

'Please help mommy lose some weight. She gets grumpy when she's on a diet that's not working.'

'My wife's on a diet. So far she's lost her personality.'

"Now that you mention it, I have to admit, the daily grind IS starting to get to me!"

'I don't get it! I've been exercising for six weeks now and haven't lost a pound.'

'Does the gym have a motorized version of this cycle?'

Shaman reads magazine entitled 'Witch Doctor'.

Gym. Instructor. Why do you want to learn kickboxing? I've always wanted to win a fight hands down!

'It's not my fault that I've developed habits that cannot be sustained.'

"Go out and play. You can't just sit there watching wall all day."

No matter what I do, I still look more like a 'before' picture than an 'after' picture.

'I'm going to suggest increasing your level of activity.'

Cures for the void.

Man to other coming out of Alternative Health Club: 'I had total joint replacement - they switched me from hemp to medical marijuana.'

"You call that complementary!?!"

Three cases of therapy-resistant low self-esteem

Laughter Therapy.

'St John's wort ambulance' - hippy ambulance.

'Everything looks good, Now, we'll just bring in the company psychic to see if you have any pre-existing conditions from a previous life.'