Weight Whimsy Enthusiast Pillows

'Relax! I just read somewhere that 142 pounds is the new 125!'

Clown on bike.

"We're pleased to announce that your company has shrewdly traded a cow for some magic beans." some ma

"The bear whose porridge was too hot...did he sue?"

Executive gym with briefcases for weights.

Statue turns into conductor when it snows.

Through the Looking Glass - The Lion and the Unicorn Fight

Alice Through the Looking Glass - Alice Climbs Through The Mirror.

Storm in a magic lamp.

Bathroom Fairy

'You're going on a long journey. Have you got an OAP's bus pass?'

Fox and a little girl hiding from the rest of the hunt.

The first microscope capable of seeing the number of angels dancing on the head of a pin.

'The doctor said my body is 40% fat. These cookies are only 20% fat. That's got to help.'

"The time has come to talk of many things; of shoes and ships and sealing wax, of double-entry bookkeeping, too."

Ghosts and Aliens in Bath

"For the last time… do not feed bubble gum to the reindeer!"

"I believe I you, Bigfoot."

Business or pleasure?

'Please bow your head and cough. I need to check your hairballs.'

Stonehens

When swine flew!

The Mad Hatter finally gets taken down.

"Come with us to see the wizard. He can find you a brain!"

Drunk Woman Sees Pink Elephants in her Garden.

A gondolier walks into the ocean wearing a gondola shaped float.

No, you don't need to be "gluten-free." I said "glutton-free"!

'Look! A rock hard body in 90 days!'

Snowman throws snowball at Santa.

'I love it when it's windy and we do a Mexican wave!'

"We are looking for temps, but I'm afraid you're too temp for us."

Mrs. Jarley's waxwork

"Oh dear, my dear. I'm afraid the tall dark stranger works at a nonprofit."

A Psychiatrist on his day off...

"You need to get in touch with your inner tadpole."