Weight Management Aficionado T-Shirts

'In local business news, declines led gainers at E-Z weight loss centres.'

Two books: 'The Joy of Cooking' next to 'The Joy of Dieting'.

Man Eating Minimalist Meal

"When you've lost fifteen pounds...that's when the refrigerator gets returned!"

'As you're pregnant, I suppose you are eating for two? Or don't you want to cut down that much?'

'Yes, the treestand's maximum weight capacity is 300 pounds, you weigh 301 pounds.'

"To lose weight they said I've just had to give up two things. . .food and drink!"

'That was when I closed five distribution centres, mothballed a factory and sacked 3,000 workers.'

'The second day of my diet is the easiest. By then, I'm off my diet.'

"I'm not sure what's causing your stomachache. But I think it's safe to rule out hunger pains."

"Double whammy. My weight now exceeds my credit score."

Fat man on scales.

"So has this obsession about your weight ever led to thoughts of suicide?"

'This high fiber diet is great! I've lost 10 pounds since I started eating my stuffing.'

'You've made wonderful progress,Miss Pritchard.'

"I would kill for your metabolism."

"This is our high-traffic, reinforced, heavy-duty model."

'I thought I told you to cut down on sugar.'

"My holy grail is low-fat, low-cal, high-taste."

'It says, 'If you want more fiber, eat the package.'

'I know dieting requires a change of lifestyle, Helen, but this is ridiculous!'

"This cat has got to go on a diet...he weighs 78 pounds!"

Chocolate never tasted as good as when I sneak a piece while dieting.

Genie.

"Well we COULD tell people to eat less and exercise more, but where's the money in that?"

'Don't worry. His diet's only last a day or two.'

Before and After diet photos.

'How much have you lost so far?', '$375.00'

"This IS our diet pizza. As I told you, it's a hole pie."

"Um, when I said you should allow yourself a cheat day, I was referring to your diet."

'I'm prescribing magnets for your weight-loss program. They'll keep this on your refrigerator door.'

'In a word, you have too much consumer confidence.'

'I always watch what I eat - right up until it disappears into my mouth.'