Weekend Renovator Gifts

'It covers well enough, but I found the recommended drying time to be completely inadequate.'

Glastonbury. After.

I could have danced all night!

'Something for the weekend, Sir?'

Painting by the numbers for adults

"In the whole length and breadth of this world there is no more admirable a spot for a man and his dog to pass the time than the local Home Depot."

Painting the Ceiling

'I love my new easylife artist's easel.'

'And just what makes you think I don't know what I'm doing?!!'

'Your husband? He's just leaving...'

"In my life, I've had seven cars, six jobs, five houses, four bypass operations, and three wives!"

'We've knocked out the interior walls to improve our home Wi-Fi coverage.'

Friday

"Because when you go first nobody else has any fun, that's why."

"She wanted to go to the beach. I wanted to golf."

'How do you like my fantasy weekend so far?'

A DIY disaster.

"The only hobby we tolerate is working on weekends."

A man repeatedly pulls the start cord on his lawn mower until it falls apart.

Preparing for casual dress friday at the investment bank.

"Ok weekend! I hope you can make up for that awful week!"

"Are you sure there wasn't a floor model?"

'No, mom, Frank wasn't struggling through woods, sand and water in a triathlon. That's his golf game.'

"Are you sure how to use a baitcaster?"

Circus Act

'And when you're done here honey, I have a nice periwinkle picked out for the foyer!'

'Thank God it's Friday', thought the watercooler.

Getting through the week.

' ... and this is the half bath.'

Non-Jet Lag.

Learn to play the violin in one weekend - 'This isn't working! It's Saturday evening already and I've only got as far as holding it properly...'

"Consensus on a Friday afternoon... what a lovely way to begin the weekend!"

George is pleased with himself. He replaced the toilet seat without calling a plumber.

'What did I SAY to DAVE?' - A person with hangover worrying about the night before.