Weeds Whisperer T-Shirts

'I do admire your honesty in your garden planning.'

The Busy Gardener

'If I had known it was going to be such a late Spring, i would have never started my garden seeds, indoors.'

"God, I hope no one asks me to sing."

'You say 'dead.' I say 'low maintenance.''

Gardener attacked by plants.

Something Wilted This Way Comes.

Gardener

"We really need more perennials? Aren't my weeds and crabgrass enough?"

Plant Lady

"Cheery little flowers, saying good night, saying good morning!"

'We use to tiptoe through the tulips. . . now we just waddle through the weeds.'

'I used to do that, but it just grows again.'

"Usually gardeners only have green thumbs, so you must really spend a lot of time in the garden."

"Looks like we grafted a few too many human genes into the kohlrabi."

An Unexpected Guest.

I hate deer! What do you have to repel them? They're awful. I've got fences. Sprays. Decoys. Tree's Tree Nursery. I'll takes these. Anything to get rid of the varmints. Ring him up, Twig. I don't know why you are so down on deer. They've been very good to you! Anti-deer.

Florabation - '..mmm...It must be spring!'

"No! I want to live! I want to live!"

Garden Goddess.

Garden Shop - Top Soil, Bottom Soil (manure)

'I know that bird feeder is guaranteed to be squirrel-proof, but I still think they are getting in there.'

'Esther, is it possible, just possible mind you, that your green thumb has gone berserk?'

An old man growing berries

"Ed's tree hugging was out of control."

'Betty liked the way her house provided lots of private space.'

Herbophiles protest mass killings of plants.

"Can you tell the oak tree to tell the birch tree to tell the elm tree I said hi?"

"I'm losing my patience with you."

"Would it kill you to give me a hug?"

Botany Baby!

Award Winning Gardener

...gon make you sweat...gon make you groove

"Security? There's a goddam tree in my office."

'Now it fits.'