Weeds Whisperer T-Shirts

'I do admire your honesty in your garden planning.'

The Busy Gardener

'If I had known it was going to be such a late Spring, i would have never started my garden seeds, indoors.'

"God, I hope no one asks me to sing."

'You say 'dead.' I say 'low maintenance.''

Something Wilted This Way Comes.

Gardener attacked by plants.

Gardener

Plant Lady

"We really need more perennials? Aren't my weeds and crabgrass enough?"

"Cheery little flowers, saying good night, saying good morning!"

'We use to tiptoe through the tulips. . . now we just waddle through the weeds.'

"Usually gardeners only have green thumbs, so you must really spend a lot of time in the garden."

"Looks like we grafted a few too many human genes into the kohlrabi."

'I used to do that, but it just grows again.'

An Unexpected Guest.

Florabation - '..mmm...It must be spring!'

"No! I want to live! I want to live!"

Garden Shop - Top Soil, Bottom Soil (manure)

Garden Goddess.

'I know that bird feeder is guaranteed to be squirrel-proof, but I still think they are getting in there.'

'Esther, is it possible, just possible mind you, that your green thumb has gone berserk?'

"Ed's tree hugging was out of control."

"Would it kill you to give me a hug?"

"Can you tell the oak tree to tell the birch tree to tell the elm tree I said hi?"

"I'm losing my patience with you."

Herbophiles protest mass killings of plants.

Botany Baby!

An old man growing berries

...gon make you sweat...gon make you groove

'Betty liked the way her house provided lots of private space.'

Award Winning Gardener

"Security? There's a goddam tree in my office."

'Now it fits.'

Woman in hospital has i.v. attached to plant.