Wedding Wackiness Aficionado Pillows

A bride and groom surrounded by cats

'Someone got me because I matched her purse, I've been to a rock concert, a night club and two weddings, Life as a designer dog is great but I'd trade caviar for kibble to get a good night's sleep,'

"And now, Marla and Dave will text their own vows."

'Okay.. what the hell.'

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

'Scratch 3 and 5. 3's had a fight and 5's just going to live together instead.'

'....Till death do you part, don't say I didn't warn you.'

"If anyone has googled reasons that these two should not be married..."

'No, but thanks for asking.'

'Silly me, I brought the wrong book -- You two just swore an oath of celibacy.'

The Wedding of Sally and Joe, as captured on film by the world's first for-profit Satellite-Photography Service, from 23,300 feet

Bride is angry, as she notices that the groom figure on the cake is drunk.

Wedding Selfie

'Who has the rings and prenup?'

"Erm, I don't think it meant just before the ceremony!!"

Trainspotters a group of trainspotters outside a church taking down details of a Bride's wedding gown train

Chef Cake Topper

Wedding selfie stick

I am married

"He's a terrific photographer but weddings are not his specialty."

"His note says the bachelor party was so great, he's decided to remain a bachelor."

'Do you Margaret take Charles to be your etc, etc, etc...just hit the 'I agree' button.'

"Well, I do and I don’t. Sometimes he can be quite irritating."

"Now that that's over, let me tell you what I'm really like"

"I'm afraid it's 'I do' ... not 'Undo'."

'You can't just nod. You have to say, I do. Good Lord. Are all mimes this annoying, or is it just you?'

When Female Leopards Marry.

"To begin with, he ate most of the wedding cake..."

Just married.

"We'd like you to leave out the poorer, sickness, and death parts - they're a little dark."

'It was her father's last wish. He said I could marry her over his dead body.'

Takeaway wedding cake 50p

'Yes he WILL do all that - I'll see to it!'

"Keep it low-tech. No mention of DNA, closing, stuff like that."