Wedding Joke Lover Pillows

Bride at wedding says to proposer 'You just don't know when to give up, do you?'

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

"And now, Marla and Dave will text their own vows."

'Okay.. what the hell.'

The Canine's version of cans tied to the back of a wedding car driving off with Cats attached

'Never mind singing it in rap... a simple 'I do' will suffice.'

'You may now kick the bride.'

"You knew I was hooked when you married me!"

Man with lobotomy scar - "Changed my mind."

"If anyone has googled reasons that these two should not be married..."

'If anybody here knows why these two should not be wed...'

'No, but thanks for asking.'

'Silly me, I brought the wrong book -- You two just swore an oath of celibacy.'

Barry's fear of commitment crops up again.

"Erm, I don't think it meant just before the ceremony!!"

"I'm sorry Jayne, but I've got cold feet."

'Do you Margaret take Charles to be your etc, etc, etc...just hit the 'I agree' button.'

"His note says the bachelor party was so great, he's decided to remain a bachelor."

'And do you, Leslie Farnsworth promise to stop wearing camouflage so that your wife will know where you are?'

'Do you promise to love her in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer, until one day she decides to bite off your head and eat you.'

"Now that that's over, let me tell you what I'm really like"

"To begin with, he ate most of the wedding cake..."

When Female Leopards Marry.

"I'm afraid it's 'I do' ... not 'Undo'."

'You can't just nod. You have to say, I do. Good Lord. Are all mimes this annoying, or is it just you?'

"I'm sorry son, was that, 'I do', or 'please kill me'?"

Just married.

'If someone objects to this union, tweet now or forever hold your peace...'

'Camilla, I don't mind you writing your own vows but you can't start 'Now Diana is dead...''

Trouble Ahead

"And do you also promise to be LinkedIn for life, facebook friends forever and to stay off Tinder till you're burnt to a cinder?"

"Man, I hate it when she sneaks up on me like that."

"Tell me, have you ever been in a church prior to getting married?"

"I knew they had shot gun weddings in the wild west, but not in Milton Keynes!"

"I now pronounce you guilty."