Wedding Humor Collectors Pillows

'No, this isn't a 'shotgun wedding' it's a 'magnum 44 wedding'!'

So the Queen doesn't do registry offices! Probably why she didn't come to our wedding!

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

"And now, Marla and Dave will text their own vows."

'Okay.. what the hell.'

'Never mind singing it in rap... a simple 'I do' will suffice.'

The Canine's version of cans tied to the back of a wedding car driving off with Cats attached

'You may now kick the bride.'

"You knew I was hooked when you married me!"

"Guide to physical comedy fish"

Man with lobotomy scar - "Changed my mind."

"If anyone has googled reasons that these two should not be married..."

'No, but thanks for asking.'

'Silly me, I brought the wrong book -- You two just swore an oath of celibacy.'

"Come on. Why not just try dog hot dogs for a change?"

"Erm, I don't think it meant just before the ceremony!!"

Australian wedding, sheep gesturing, 'If there's anybody here who knows why these two should not be wed...'

The Heating Oil Problem.

'And do you, Leslie Farnsworth promise to stop wearing camouflage so that your wife will know where you are?'

'Relax, he is just playing fetch the stick with the kids.'

'Oh yeah? Well I'm not crazy about your humming, either!'

"His note says the bachelor party was so great, he's decided to remain a bachelor."

"Horace, what are we doing on the same cloud? Our vows said 'till death do us part.'"

'The urge to spawn comes from the desire to hear the pitter-patter of tiny fins.'

'Do you Margaret take Charles to be your etc, etc, etc...just hit the 'I agree' button.'

'Do you promise to love her in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer, until one day she decides to bite off your head and eat you.'

'In future a reg number will suffice, ok.'

"Now that that's over, let me tell you what I'm really like"

"I'm afraid it's 'I do' ... not 'Undo'."

Why clown agents shoul never hide in the WC

"Can you fit him with remote control facilities, doctor"

'You can't just nod. You have to say, I do. Good Lord. Are all mimes this annoying, or is it just you?'

Just married.