Wedding Humor Aficionados Pillows

Fanciful 'Continental' Marriage of Prince George and Maria Anne Fitzherbert

'You may now deflower the bride.'

"Do you, Darlene, take Jim to be your lawfully wedded husband, when you could, clearly, do far better?"

'Okay.. what the hell.'

"And now, Marla and Dave will text their own vows."

'He does.'

'I now pronounce you man and wife, you now may kiss you sweet little bachelor butt goodbye.'

',,, and if anyone knows of a reason why these two should not be married, let them storm this castle with pitchforks and torches or forever hold their peace,'

The Canine's version of cans tied to the back of a wedding car driving off with Cats attached

'Never mind singing it in rap... a simple 'I do' will suffice.'

'No, but thanks for asking,'

'How about joining us for a soda and pizza after the ceremony?'

'You may now kick the bride.'

"I do. Have your people contact my people to hammer out the details."

"What's this for poorer stuff?"

"You knew I was hooked when you married me!"

'...I now pronounce you man and wife, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.'

"Excuse me, Reverend, but what, exactly, do you have to do to get a drink around here?"

Man with lobotomy scar - "Changed my mind."

"If anyone has googled reasons that these two should not be married..."

'No, but thanks for asking.'

'Wait a minute -- you haven't said anything about a retirement age.'

'Silly me, I brought the wrong book -- You two just swore an oath of celibacy.'

"First, I'll read the minutes from your last weddings."

Bride with a ventriloquist's dummy.

Bride is angry, as she notices that the groom figure on the cake is drunk.

'I didn't know the church sold an extended warrenty on marriage?'

"Erm, I don't think it meant just before the ceremony!!"

"If either of you know any cause or impediment why you should not be married, INCLUDING YouTube CLIPS, declare it now."

'In sickness and in health, under affordable health care or unaffordable. . .'

The Aisle

'And by clicking on 'I Agree,' you agree to the terms and conditions...'

Australian wedding, sheep gesturing, 'If there's anybody here who knows why these two should not be wed...'

"Congratulations, dude, and you may now play tonsil hockey with the bride."

'My wife says not to worry. She's convinced she can get me out of here with coupons.'