Web Whisperers Gifts

'What size would you like ma'am...e-mail, blog, or world wide web?'

"In the first place, it isn't "maddening crowd.' It's 'madding crowd.' "

Jack of all trades

"Tech-support has confirmed it. Screaming and hitting the computer won't solve the problem. You'll have to try something else."

"The robots have become self-aware and self-loathing. Now all they do is write novels."

Have you tried turning it off and on again?

'Can you loan me *** till pay day?'

Computer help.

"He's from IT. All I did was tell him I thought he was doing a great job... and he fainted in shock!"

Two computers are having a conversation, but stop when their owner enters the room.

'Tell me more about your programmer.'

'The computer can talk to terminals all over the country. Bentley thinks it's talking about him.'

"Your first job is to learn to recognize your boss' voice on the phone."

'Decoding is often 1, 14, 20, 9, 3, 12, 9, 13, 1, 3, 20, 9, 3.'

Computer whisperer.

we wanted to get rid of all the 'superbugs' but they were the only one's who understood the new it system

'I'm sorry, but it's suffering from a terminal disease.'

WWW.World.com

You will do as I command...'It had a power surge.'

The fax machine had stopped and they did not know why.

"Sorry, honey, I can't talk now. I'm in the midst of some very intense negotiations with Bill Gates on the electronic rights to you and the kids."

'Sometimes, when I'm feeling unappreciated, I'll fake a system-wide data crash.'

'My Turing Machine doesn't understand me.'

Office full of computers and wires.

"He fights me when I tell him to take a nap. When I reword it and say go reboot, he doesn't have a problem."

'He's had too much exposure to wi-fi.'

"You got my text... but did you get my subtext?"

'It's been telling you to blood-let a pint a day? When's the last time you updated that medical app?'

Sad looking computer with plasters and a black eye

"Need help with your computer project? I have 2 teens at home."

'Good morning, This is receptionist Susan, portal to the boss.'

'If I need emergency assistance with this program, do I type 911?'