Web Doctor Skeptic Pillows

"I looked up my symptoms on the internet and found out that I'm DEAD and it's YOUR FAULT!"

A boy is sat at a desk, with five plaques implying different qualifications he has earned from using social media.

'My daughter read on the internet about a hip replacement with free built-in MP3 player,'

"My blood type...it's the type that doesn't like to exercise."

'You don't have a heart murmur, but your liver is muttering.'

'According to Dr Alvin McDowell, everything that was good for you is now bad for you!'

"...And those are some of the books I would have read if the Internet had never been invented."

"Well, who you gonna believe? Me or Wikipedia?"

"When I was a kid there was no internet. If you wanted to bully someone, you had to do it to their face."

"And more intriguingly, your prognosis differs depending on which search engine I use."

"I'm sorry, Tom, you'll have to come in. I can't diagnose just from your tweets!"

The Big Book of Really Hard Surgery

'Mrs. Tomkins says her prescription has no side effects, so it can't be doing her any good.'

"I suggest you take these pills on an empty stomach."

"No, as of yet, they are not on the internet!"

"My Doctor said I needed more exercise so I jogged down to the donut shop."

'I had a stomach ache, so I took bicarb of soda and went to bed early. Did I do the right thing?'

'You're not my usual doctor.'

"I found out something last night that just totally destroyed my worldview."

"Yes, everything—I need a list of all the medications you're on."

"My doctor said I needed to go on a diet. . . Yes, to a new doctor!"

"You're suffering from banner blindness."

"According to this website my symptoms show that I'm dead!"

"Oh look, dear. when you press 'alt-right' it types a little swastika!"

"The internet begs to differ."

"I think the dosage needs adjusting. I'm not nearly as happy as the people in the ads."

"It's the only way I can get some of my paitents to listen to me."

Hypochondriac at two computers. One reads 'Internet diagnosis', other says 'Second opinion'.

'Pop, is that where they make all of those new medicines with the bad side effects?'

'This is probably the first person to have died from a homeopathy overdose... '