Wealthy Schemer T-Shirts

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

'Why don't you leave the planning of our wedding to me?'

'You're closer to the Big Guy than anyone. Will you help us kill him?'

“Son, that… ‘some this will all be yours’… is now!”

"I suppose you're wondering why I've summoned you here at 3 AM, minion." "I try not to wonder." "After crunching the numbers, I've determined we'd increase profits by being open 24/7." "We're in the suburbs. Everyone's asleep." "Not true. By being closed at 3 AM, we're missing out on the potentially-lucrative Igor the Wino clientele." "Go to the alley and give Igor a 1-for-the-price-of-2 coupon." "Very bad man."

"My assistant is more of a behind-the-scenes kind of guy."

"I'm in big trouble. The dog ate my homework, and Dad ate my science project."

'Do you want to be red Tory or blue Labour?'

'We're seeking a safe tax haven for our investments.'

'let's see if we can find any loopholes in this 'honesty-is-the-best-policy' nonsense.'

'Damn, I just love this new problem solving tool!'

"Look, let's just say I haven't seen anything, Charlie hasn't heard anything, and Tom hasn't said anything."

'We've decided to foreclose on Paraguay, Ferguson -- Get down there and take the place over.'

"So, are we singing from the same hymnbook?"

Old man stealing sand from a sand box for child

"Doing chores is very stimulating. I'm always thinking of ways to avoid them."

'I'm always thinking of my fellow man - that's how I stay ahead of him.'

'Not a bad day. I started a phony company in computer lab, made a public stock offering over lunch hour and socked away fifteen million into an off-shore bank account before afternoon recess!'

'We're looking to expand our globalization into countries that don't extradite.'

"This is an imaginative expenses claim. I wish we could use those skills of yours in the business."

"I'm moving all the money from our rainy day account into a slush fund."

"May I have your attention? For Christmas, all I want is for everyone to write a note on how smart, charming and social I am. I'm collecting college reference letters before I enter my terrible teens."

In. Out. Destroyed without my knowledge.

"If we don't decide what we're worth, who will?"

"Let's tell him we've been good. He probably won't call our bluff."

"If I do that to my own Barbie, imagine what might happen to a tattle-tale."

Successful business man

'Psst... Wanna' buy any coconuts?'

Days Of Conquest

'Maybe we should wait until after we've won all that money playing poker until we tell the boss where to go...'

"The lab boys figured out how to change lead into gold. Now your job is to corner the lead market."

Young man at the beach asking friend to kiss his sister hoping he can then kiss friends sister

'This is my brilliant concept for a maximum return with zero employment costs! The customers give money to us but we don't give them any products!'

'Ms,Hobbs, send in someone devious, I'm in the mood to match wits today,'

"Our plan for world domination starts with the chew toys."