Wealth Strategizer Pillows

'Bust is the new boom.'

The day the stock market went UP.

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

'We've set the bar quite high at this company. It helps us control bonuses.'

"Our light bill is astronomical living next to a black hole."

(oil - petroleum - gushing out of inkwell)

"Gentlemen, we're missing a great opportunity by not hitching this company to the current tailspin."

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

"I'm not here to slay you. I'm here to talk to you about diversifying your investment portfolio."

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

Will work for ETFs

'You know the economy's in trouble when the Forbes 400 list of wealthiest Americans only has 350 names on it.'

'Dammit - how do we get in on that gross national product?'

"O.K. he's a billionaire, but how much of it is in cash?"

Thanks to the financial business scientists know it for sure now - Black Holes really exist!

'Now that we've defined 'happy deficits' let's try it out on the stockholders.'

'If only I'd spent as much time on my investment portfolio as I did on my lolly mix when I was a kid.'

"Well, either you're hopelessly optimistic or hopelessly short-sighted."

'Plimbco Bank &Trust, Old Money Division.'

"Remember, money is only a tool - to make more money."

'The bad news is it's all our client's money.'

'He's refusing to die as a protest against Inheritance Tax.'

Stock market investment advice

"At these tuition prices an acceptance letter is pretty much a denial."

"I just..."

'well of course I'm giving your portfolio the attention it deserves, I'm even wearing a black armband!'

"Ahh... don't you just LOVE that new, re-organized-under-bankruptcy-protection smell?"

'Are we broke yet?'

'The recession is over, again.'

'This is the BEST well we've dug!!'

'We want it painted the colour of money!'

'You shouldn't have taken that personal pension.' 'You shouldn't have taken that endowment mortgage.' 'When do you get your free tv license?' Job's comforters, today.

Flat tax - equal burden?

"Well, Comstock, still regret putting our profits back into research?"

"Genius is 1% inspiration, 99% budget allocation."