Wealth Strategizer Pillows

'Bust is the new boom.'

The day the stock market went UP.

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

'We've set the bar quite high at this company. It helps us control bonuses.'

"Our light bill is astronomical living next to a black hole."

(oil - petroleum - gushing out of inkwell)

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

"Gentlemen, we're missing a great opportunity by not hitching this company to the current tailspin."

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

Will work for ETFs

Thanks to the financial business scientists know it for sure now - Black Holes really exist!

'Dammit - how do we get in on that gross national product?'

"O.K. he's a billionaire, but how much of it is in cash?"

'Now that we've defined 'happy deficits' let's try it out on the stockholders.'

"Well, either you're hopelessly optimistic or hopelessly short-sighted."

'If only I'd spent as much time on my investment portfolio as I did on my lolly mix when I was a kid.'

"Remember, money is only a tool - to make more money."

'Plimbco Bank &Trust, Old Money Division.'

'The bad news is it's all our client's money.'

'He's refusing to die as a protest against Inheritance Tax.'

Stock market investment advice

"Well, Comstock, still regret putting our profits back into research?"

'The recession is over, again.'

'You shouldn't have taken that personal pension.' 'You shouldn't have taken that endowment mortgage.' 'When do you get your free tv license?' Job's comforters, today.

'We want it painted the colour of money!'

"At these tuition prices an acceptance letter is pretty much a denial."

"Ahh... don't you just LOVE that new, re-organized-under-bankruptcy-protection smell?"

'Are we broke yet?'

'well of course I'm giving your portfolio the attention it deserves, I'm even wearing a black armband!'

"I just..."

Flat tax - equal burden?

'This is the BEST well we've dug!!'

"Genius is 1% inspiration, 99% budget allocation."

Investing your savings