Watching Detective Films Gifts

"Mister Watson, come here -- I need to know why we're not on a first-name basis."

A boy acting suspiciously

"The yellow spotted green bird, eats its body weight in bugs, and mates once every three years."

The Philip Marlow family

'After giving a recorded statement to these people, being grilled by 60 Minutes would seem like a piece of cake.'

The following wildlife film is sponsored in part by a grant from...Mother Nature Foundation.

"Seriously, you can't balance the budget with cushion change."

"And next up, Fairy Tales: FolkLORE or FolkLIES!"

"Is this fiction, non-fiction or historical fiction?"

"Okay so which one stole your cereal?"

"We subscribe to five streaming services so why are we never able to see the hot new show everybody is raving about?"

A bunch of global warming skeptics want to join eco club. It's a school organization. You have to let them in. But they just want to harass us with selective facts! Today: Eco club. So? Debate is good. You have :An Inconvenient Truth" to counter their arguments. Oh. Great. Now we'll have to read it.

"Another CSI spinoff? What's this one called?"

Cop Shop: Bulk, dried blood, shaved hair, ground teeth, assorted body parts and bone fragments.

'So, what's it gonna be? Are we gonna watch a good cop show tonight, or a bad cop show?'

Weird – I think everything they watch is called, That actor looks so familiar what else have we seen him in.

"Ok, don't move. I want to capture the drama and intrigue of your life."

"Nothing like the History Channel to get you to appreciate these peaceful times we're enjoying."

"Check this wall for fingerprints."

'I'm a simple man really beneath the code words and the black ops and the multitude of fake passports.'

"I found a partial thumbprint. Let's get the heck out of here"

Sicko.

Violence on TV.

Where were you on the night of December 24th between 10pm and 5am

"Hmmm...this'll be a tough one..."

'This will help you keep track of who's who.'

"Whack him. And if you can't whack him, redact him."

'So now you sniff out drugs. That's it, no more TV cop shows.'

"We've picked up a tail."

The Future of Detective Work

'So what else can you do, besides reign?'

"You're not leaving until we know everything."

'Oh, how moving, it's a woodland burial, Dennis.'

The Sun: A History. . .

You're on the "Ask Sadie" show. What's your problem?! I just found out "Empire" and "Star" are in the same universe. For months I've been telling everyone I knew that "Star" was a blatant ripoff of "Empire." But then I found out they're made by the same people and they're in the same tv universe, and I'm like totally fine with it now. Stop it! We speak "English" on this show, not "tv addict"! Wait a minute ... are we talking about soap operas? Because there's an exception for soap operas. No, we