Washing Machines Gifts

"Most people don't seem to know this, but if this button is used incorrectly it will cause socks to disappear."

"The good old days of eating the washing off the line are all gone methinks: The farmer has bought an electric dryer..."

Moses separating his Laundry.

The Missing Sock Returns

"The dryer giveth and the dryer taketh away."

Santa Claus's wife beats the soot out of his beard.

'I started out washing dishes, but when the dishwater tasted better than the soup...'

"What makes you think I'm dripping it on my shirt?"

"Consider yourself lucky that you only got a little shaken up in that dryer--socks get lost in that thing and aren't ever seen again.'

A man washing a mascot costume

"Drunk, yet orderly"

'Before you come with me, tell me...does this robe look a little rumpled to you? I don't think the dry cleaners got the creases out, do you?'

Crane operator Jimmy Morrison liked to break in new guys by giving them what he called a 'sky wedgie.'

"I hoped you'd change your hobby when you became a father"

"It's a smart hamper that sucks up clothes. My mom claims I leave my clothes on the floor, so she has it follow me wherever I go."

"You know the stories about putting a pair of socks into the washing machine and getting out just one of them...Jones, it seems that we found the hideaway of the second socks!"

Congratulations on your retirement!

The wooden clothes horse of Troy.

"I don't do windows."

'Does this thing get channel four.'

"I feel like tearing of all your clothes and putting them in the washing machine."

"The election's over, Trump won, the illegals are being deported and I'm here for one of them there high-paying American jobs he promised."

"So that's where all the socks ended up!"

Dreams I have had...

Cat mistakes bars for toilets.

"I'm just the bus boy but I'll be ignoring you also."

"Like you, I was lost...then I found Jesus!"

Help! (Woman stuck on washing line).

"Damn. These must have shrunk in the wash." "I don't think so."

"Wait, you never wash your cape?"

Fashion Update Dryer Sheets

"Since we installed the video surveillance system we're losing fewer socks."

Santa's wash day.

"To be joined together as a matched pair, in cleanliness and in filth, until separation in the laundry do you part?"

'Whenever Mat gets a little over-confident, I tell him to try to fold a fitted bed sheet.'