Wartime History Gifts

Tea and Sugar Rationing

'And that's my last slide on the Russian campaign. Would somebody raise the blinds please.'

'Call me in two weeks' time.'

'Daddy, what did you do during the post-war period?'

'These days,' she says, 'nothing gets a rise out of him.'

"He reports to Grand Central Palace tomorrow."

"Tractors, Sir - thousands of 'em!"

Your Country Needs MOO!

Napoleon marches off alone

Siegfried Sassoon

"Most of the time, war...it makes no sense. A lot of times, we'd hear artillery whistling over our heads. But really, you can't move. You just wait...and wait...until it hits...and hope it isn't hitting you."

Get Ahead

'Appears to have suicidal tendencies'

"Mother, I'd like you to meet a member of the armed forces."

The real reason the Christmas Truce didn't last.

'And remind your father to take out the chicken from the freezer and don't forget to do your homework.'

'Stamp auction' WW2 Victory stamps on two fingers

British patent (applied for) A Trained Dog of war Drawing the Enemy's Fire.

For the War Inventions Board. The Armoured Bayonet-curler for the Spoiling the Temper of the Enemy's Steel

"Well, thats buggered that idea"

"Heavens! I'd better rush home. my phone may be ringing."

"We didn't have telly in wartime, we had to make our own violence."

Soldiers

"The luck didn't last. A shell finally got me near Batogne. Honestly, I didn't know I was injured until I reached down and found a hole in my leg. It makes you realize things."

"... and so, gentlemen, I have to report that, despite the not inconsiderable complications and burdens presented by the war, the income of the North American Broadcasting Company showed a net increase of two per cent."

"Urgent message from Captain Sasson, sir - do you know any words that rhyme with orange?"

"Why don't you join the Army."

King George VI

A clever ruse. How two German officers carried a gun past the British lines.

"My dad was in the war, but he doesn't talk about it."

"Do you care for the soldier type?"

Bayeux Tapestry: 'Ah well, it's all part of ...'

Santa Clause Visits Union Troops

"It's not a bullet hole - it's a cavity."

'Shark!'