War Commander Pillows

A military officer sits at his desk with desk trays marked 'Search' and 'Destroy.'

"Weather like this plagued my retreat from Moscow."

Infantry.

Girl on a giant pair of scissors.

'Your wife called to remind you that you're married, sir.'

Victims of War

'Everyone keeps telling me I need my eyes checked, so here I am!'

ISIS needle in a haystack.

John McCain, pre-RIP

The House Always Wins

Burning the Other

Don't Worry, Joe, about Afghanistan

Sailing enthusiast brings his hobby to his office.

'That's my mom... she's sort of a CEO, an action committee, and a janitor all rolled up into one.'

'You know you're doing your job right when both coaches are mad at you.'

'No. No. Don't bomb them now. Wait until morning, when the birds are singing and the air is alive with a sense of possibility.'

'I found it on Craig's List.'

'Peace' in our time.

P.O.W. !! to US credibility.

"Sorry sir, it's the permafrost again!"

"Ok, boy, one more time, then I'd better get this thing back to the battlefield."

'Taking the anger management class has made you uncharacteristically nice, sir.'

"I'm sorry I called you boring."

'Remember, son. A winner is one who can keep his head while all around him are losing theirs.'

The press under fire

'War, drought, famine, diseases: Boy I love the news...'

"It's from Private Ryan...Wish you were here."

Referee

'Rabbit Leader here, No, you may NOT return to base because your sock keeps botching up,'

'Shame on you! Stop torturing the poor Palestinians, you nazi-like, baby killing war monger!'

'I didn't know you got one for saluting.'

'Here's a field can opener, you may need it to cut yourself out of your tank.'

'Why do you always get to be the tanks?'

'This one is for being the TV war commentator who didn't blast Rumsfeld.'

USS Party Time.