Wall-building Wizard Gifts

Mason's Bricks + Cakes

Gracie's baby toys.

Texturing the Walls

'Masonry robot, what are you doing?'

'Brian's saved us a small fortune...making all our own furniture!'

"Now that we have these Earthlings in our power, we can take over this planet!"

'... and we're also having a sale on do-it-yourself emergency surgery kits.'

Children's Imagination

'Now there's a real pro! He can even nail while power napping.'

'I don't care if they are cheaper...we're not using them!'

'He was always too busy to sit for his portrait.'

"Wow! That's an amazing welding project!"

'It's called fire...it recycles wood.'

"I'm the ghost of woodshop past."

"Most projects require three hands."

"That could've been ours. But noooo...You and your DIY."

Woodpecker carves David out of tree.

Go on! Pick a card.

'I'm telling you, I don't have a good feeling about this.'

'Since Bubba acclimated to urban living, we've underbid our competitors because we don't need to build scaffolding or rent a crane.'

'It's worse than we thought... You've got termites.'

Why you should never leave a sander alone in a locked room.

"For your information, officer, I was not ‘texting’ – I was reviewing candidate applications for fellowship grants!"

'Note his bold brush strokes, Fred...'

Members of the Luddite community carving computers from solid blocks of oak and maple

Carpenter

Bricklayers in goal.

"We're going have to build higher walls."

Reality home-improvement show.

'Ingredients: 'pine, ash, walnut, nails, insulation materials of unknown origin and all-natural asphalt shingles.'

'Now there's a real pro! He can even nail while power napping.'

Spring/Summer/Winter

'That was some varnish remover!'

Oh, good - Looks like the doctor's in.

'Joe makes all our own funiture!'