Waiting Room Veteran Gifts

Please don't feed the fish.

'No, Mr. Simmons, your MR images aren't in yet. We have older equipment, which takes a little longer to process.'

You're next, Mr. Kimble - right after his apple danish.

'Sorry the doctor is running behind. You can keep today's appointment or I can fit you in tomorrow...whichever comes first.'

Medical Center.

'The doctor will be right with you shortly, he's finishing medical school.'

'You think you have it rough. Try organizing a waiting room.'

"The doctor says Tia Carmen is resting now...he's encouraging all family visitors to go home. We'll see you back here tomorrow."

"Please fill out these forms. We don't need them for anything, but you're making me nervous staring at your watch."

'This is taking longer than my stay in hospital!'

'Guess who I bumped into today? EVERYBODY!'

"Actually, I didn't become dizzy and nauseous until I started inhaling the scent strips in the waiting room magazines."

'I'll take #1.'

'I think you'll find that I'm next. . .'

'I believe you were first.'

'Tell the doctor I'll be with him in another page and a half.'

"Sorry about the long wait, but good news. Other than long waits in waiting rooms, I can't find any other causes for your irritability."

'Have I been waiting long? Well, I guess so. I was forty three years old when I came in.'

"Well, if you want my blood pressure lower don't keep waiting two hours to see you."

Time-Off Coupons

"The doctor would like to know if anyone else out here needs surgery before he puts his stuff away."

"You appear to have caught that bug that's been going around my waiting room."

"When did we switch from magazines to musical instruments?"

'Can't read this one either. Think anyone would mind if I just rolled around in them?'

'Well, good morning Mr. Daniel, have a seat in our waiting room.'

"Fill out the form and have a seat in the waaait... waaait... waiting room."

Warning! Magazines Stay in Waiting Room

Top 10 things to worry about in 2020.

"Feel free to imagine you might have any of the conditions you read about in the magazines."

You'd think fro the cost of an appointment, the doctor could afford current magazines!

'It's a salesman selling seven year old magazines for your waiting room.'

'That Doctor has a lot of nerve...I've waited six weeks for this appointment and he says, 'you're lucky we caught it in time'.'

"Fill out these 'new patient' forms, but leave 'age' blank, as you may age a year before you're done."

'I read all the magazines I then paper mached your likeness and repeatedly stabbed you.'

"O.K. Which one of you worried well is the most worried?"