Wage Analyst Gifts

Catch W-2

'What bothers me about these meetings is even though it's work, I have the nagging feeling I ought to leave and get back to work.'

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

The Businessmen Have to Make Decisions from Many Options

"We need to make some cuts. We'll start with integrity, accountability, openness, and transparency."

'This job is for a 30 hour week. . .but to achieve that you need to work 60 hours a week.'

"The data looks good, sir, but the vibes are mucho heavioso."

'Whoever said 'The only thing we have to fear is fear itself' never had a room full of angry shareholders.'

"How's everybody doing? I'm not boring you, am I?"

"Worst case of month-end burnout I ever saw."

"Right about here there was a flattening of the curve. . ."

'I vote we hang the darn thing upside down and go home!'

Light Bulb Moment

"So, what brings you in today, Mr. Brooks? High anxiety again?"

"I think I'll be late back for tea. . . about a week."

"The trend in tough economic times is to put off everything that doesn't require immediate action ? as this chart shows."

'We're finding out that those 'wrongs' we made 'right' were actually right after all.'

The Life of Pi

"Morning, all!"

Lethal Presentation

'What happened to that efficiency report? I had it in my hand not two minutes ago.'

"I hate performance review season."

Freedom comes at a cost. We must be willing to pay the ultimate price. Retail.

Time Is Money

A presenter with a very complex chart to explain a business plan - 'And it's as simple as that!'

"If i were to kiss you then there is a 17% probability that we might get married and that has a 24% likelihood that we'd have children with a 34% change of divorce...I'm not sure I can risk it."

'We're living in a round hole economy.'

'Why can't you tell me you love me without all the charts and graphs?!'

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

"Perhaps this slide whistle can better illustrate what this graph is telling us."

'We're holding our own, but I'd really like to see some growth.'

'Hey, the quarter wasn't so bad after all.'

'The government's right. Not counting, food, clothing, energy, shelter, health care, or transportation, inflation is hardly going up.'

"Just heading out for a good cry, care to join me?"

'Let's hope the new norm means that less really is more.'