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'No, but thanks for asking,'

"In twenty seconds, our crew will be traveling fast enough to escape the Earth’s problems."

"I never accomplish the impossible, if I did it would become an expectation."

'Is that 'forsaking all others' bit compulsory?'

'Relax, we're letting you go. Your insurance didn't go through.'

Anger Management - Now Treating "Electoral College Rage"

"Data is just another way of never having to say you're sorry. You know that, David."

Cunning as a Fox hey? Well, I saw you cheating Mister! D-Minus!

"So...what did you learn in school today, Baldo?"

'What's the point of having a luxury car if you put it in the garage at night?'

"He's not good with change!"

Man to lady regarding 'Resistance Exercises' book: 'No thanks. I've been an expert on resisting to exercise for 20 years.'

'I'' be in the basement, Amy... below the radar.'

Man fishing at a dock sees a billboard: Did You Forget Mother's Day?

"I have a prescription for my test anxiety."

"I got an extension.'

"Can we, just for a moment, your Honor, ignore the facts?"

"How much do we owe them?"

Car driving on tube line - 'They'll do anything to avoid the new congestion charge.'

"I have an app that does my exercise for me!"

"I'd like a word with you please."

"Math scares me so much I can't even add it to my list of anxieties."

His Master's Noise.

'Can we avoid going through the insurance company.'

"What an exhausting weekend! I made too may commitments Friday during Happy Hour and spent Saturday and Sunday weaseling out of them."

What say we save a tree, and skip the test?

"No, Harry, shaking ketchup on your burger and chips twice a day cannot be counted as exercise."

'Listen up! Me and Everyone else will run for our lives. Dewey You stay back and block.'

Recent studies show that a man's fear of commitment extends to the television, where he suffers an unrelenting paranoia that something better is on another channel.

"Those aren't blanks, Ms Doan. They're no comments."