Vote Guru Gifts

The Dali 'Bama.

'His best qualities are circumventing questions and evading answers.'

'You realize, we can't use the 'benign neglect' method for everything.'

Who should be the next eco-club president? The most vegan? The most carbon neutral? The most into solar? Eco-club. But we need someone who will attract kids to the environmental cause. Then it's obvious. The most popular. Or most athletic!

Unanimous voting.

'All in favor of my idea say 'Aye.' All opposed, say 'Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers' ten times real fast.'

'Can you fetch all of these but leave these others alone?'

"I'll cross any ocean to fight for our country! I'll travel to the gates of hell to defend our rights!"

'I know we can't repeal the laws of nature, but I don't see why we can't amend them a little.'

Jasper Coot: 'Osama shoulda named me to the Supreme Court! I ain't no judge, so I'm qualified! Hell. I ann't even a damn lawyer! But Lord knows, I am judgemental!

The Election Strategy

"This is part of the privatisation I don't like."

"He sounds authentic. That gets my vote."

'I know I was just here yesterday, but the courts ordered a recount.'

'Just how informal is this constitution?'

Vote for Brown

Still the Same

'English majors on the bulldozers, poli-sci majors on the dump trucks, sociology on the excavators...'

"Maybe we apply as a group....crowdsourcing employment."

"You spend years waiting for any politician to pay you the slightest attention!"

'It's all right, Dad -- it's a Buddhist chat room!'

'Goodness Frank, where did all the mud come from?' - 'Election campaigns.'

Democracy - one of the drawbacks.

"As most MPs are lawyers that should give you a clue as to the mess we are in!"

Approval Rating

"What factors influenced your decision to use this particular exit?"

'I can't help politicizing everything!'

'Now then, tell me about your fear of being alone.'

No attitudes beyond this point

Now I'd like to depart from my prepared text and speak from the heart...

"Remember, gentlemen, we aren't here just to draft a constitution. We're here to draft the best damned constitution in the world."

"I'm undecided, but that doesn't mean I'm apathetic or uninformed."

Belonging to a group is motivational.

'I think this unparliamentary language all started with the oath of allegiance!...They were asked: 'Do you Swear'...'

Disraeli entrusted with the task of forming a Conservative Ministry