Vocabulary Whiz T-Shirts

"I'm tardy? Whew! I was afraid I was going to be late for school!"

"My answers could be right. Your quiz just asked the wrong questions."

This is Lenny the leopard with the on-the-spot news.

Frank & Ernie's Diner. Special: Scrabbled Eggs. No, sir, it's not a misprint -- Ernie adds alphabet soup.

Dog Park

Nerd tryouts.

The First Annual Game Show Week.

Ninedency: A budding tendency

Sauce for the Goose

"She's a show dog...purebred, of course." "That's great! My guy's a Sanskrit scholar...wrote for the Harvard Lampoon."

"I think before we begin to address me, we need to talk about the clown in the room."

Examinations.

'Unaccustomed as I am to public speaking...'

"I spy with my little eye…"

'If I don't chew this, my S.A.T. scores will skyrocket.'

"It's a swearbox."

I'm not sure which, but he's just invented either writing or vandalism. (Published originally on Feb. 11, 2011.)

'I'm afraid you've failed the Turing test.'

"Brilliant cover letter, lousy résumé."

"Of course you can't put your finger on it. It's a hypothetical particle."

A gift to complete the man cave.

"You're famous, Angus."

'Gifted class, indeed. One is gifted in science, but he can't read - one is gifted in reading, but won't even try math...'

Sub Editor

Global Positioning Manual

Writing the poem was easy: there are lots of words rhyming with "snow"...

Apex Dictionaries Co - sign reads: Clowsed,bak at too.

'That's a million correct answers in a row!'

'That's Friday, Ed.'

A Court Reporter's Pocket Knife

'They decided to immure the ladrone in a drogue.'

Wordplay: Pantomime.

Wordplay: Me.

Performance Enhancing Lemonade.

Law 'N' Order