Visiting Chengdu Gifts

Chengdu

'Do you have one with the number 401k? under the law averages, it's bound to be winner.'

Emigrating to France.

Centaur Sprinter

'Congratulations! You've just won ten million dollars!'

A Snake Charmer's snake is on a lunch break

Before the wall, there was the great velvet rope of China.

'Excuse me, what do you wear under your kilt?' - 'Shoes and socks.'

'Millers said they travelled through Europe? Nonsense! All of their souvenirs have little tags reading 'Made in China'!'

'That will be $600, thank you...'

Centaur Driver

8th Annual Chainsaw Carving Competition

Misfortune Cookie

Christian Book Shop has sign saying 'We have Noah's Ark' whilst the Weather Bureau next door has sign saying 'You're gonna need it'.

Doug Kershaw

Many conservatives don't want to invest in the country because, deep down, they think God controls our destiny; not mankind or even nation-states. Pshaw! Some of us just don't like giving money to a bunch of bozos who aren't likely to spend it well. What?! You're taking their side. You're conservative now? Until the president gets more hunky. Please stop before I grow incensed. If democrats nominate Clint Eastwood from the Dirty Harry movies, I will find your theory compelling.

'Oh great! Look who's here. Like, we have a chance with these two girls now.'

'Believe it or not, but he used to be a gag cartoonist!'

'Alright, I'll give you a discount...'

Classic Hybrid

Edna arrives home unexpectedly.

How's the college tour? Dunno. Tap Tap. You'd have 2 ask the parents. Tap tap.

They're slashing our health care and pension to cut the budget at work. Plus, I have to take an unpaid furlough week. Let's go see colleges! Ok! That will take my mind off my depressing finances. University. And!

"I can't decide if I'm in the mood for Italian or hay."

"It isn't charisma, and he didn't write a best seller. It's a winning lottery ticket."

Hillbilly playing Banjo.

'STOP DOING THAT!'

"Hey, tomorrow we could leaf through our passports!"

"Your wife collects stamps! That's nothing, mine collects fine china! You have no idea how stressful it is for me..."

Happy 2015 Year of the Ram

Hou Yi

"Gimme everything in the register and a Quick Pick."

"Father would be much happier if you wouldn't."

'Porcelain! I must have porcelain!'

"Decisions, decisions!"