Visionary Humor Lover Pillows

"Now let's try the other other other eye."

"Our business is based on breakthroughs."

Large print e-book.

"Caricatures $20"

"Could you tilt the Earth just a bit more away from the light?"

Cinderella insisted on always having glass slippers - even into old age...

The worm that churned!

Sharp Eyes

'Old mother hubbard -- your cupboard is now bare.'

"I've worked as a wet-nurse for ten years, but I'm after something new now..."

"I was kicked out from another kid's bed. Do you mind if I crash under yours for awhile?"

'You say you're having trouble seeing into the future'

"Look! A sushi bar!"

'I gave up hope of receiving a Genius Grant years ago. Now I'm basically shooting for the less impressive Mediocrity Grant.'

IT security.

"It's your husband, Mrs. Thompson. He's come unraveled again."

"That's still too high"

'I'VE GOT EYE CANDY!'

Banana

"Excuse me, but I'm the only one who opens cans around here!"

"Your problem isn't the prescription."

"You folks ready to order?"

The Exobus

'My biological clock finally went off.'

How to create a brilliant cartoon

'Guess who I bumped into today? EVERYBODY!'

"Charlie's really interested in co-operative housing..."

"Must go now Zelda. The builders have just arrived"

'Man, when was the last time you had your eyes tested?'

"Does my brain look big in this?"

'My doctor wants me to watch what I eat, so I'm here for glasses.'

'Unknown fact: Cows aren't grazing...they're searching for their contact lenses.'

"I'm here because my vision is getting so bad I can't even see clearly in my dreams at night!"

"Anita, you never told me you worked for a company with such deep pockets!"