Vision Warrior Pillows

'Have you ever thought of trying contact lenses?'

'I still can't see a thing. Do you have an easier eye chart?'

"With the new year approaching, I was hoping you could help with my resolution...."

'Run, Spot, run.'

A question you don't want - "How many fingers am I holding up."

"Of course, you've got to expect some side effects with Eye Laser Treatment."

'I really crammed last night.'

"Are you not thinking what I'm not thinking?"

"Our Rupert has swopped his gaming console for bagpipes...it gets us out of the house more often."

"This is not what I meant when I said you needed to practice your play fighting..."

I'm not sure they understood what I was getting at. Yeah, they all looked confused, didn't they?

Hospital Departments

'It's Blurred.'

"I am totally ready for this presentation."

'No cheating'

"Just one question...how on earth do I get down?!"

'Everyone keeps telling me I need my eyes checked, so here I am!'

'All this knowledge going into my head, through my eyes and out the window to float forever in space.'

The New Business Power Suit

"I think I need an eye check: I almost got fooled by a lure yesterday..."

'Don't worry...you'll grow into them.'

I'm Aging Gracefully...so SHUT UP!!!

The optician's arrival ended Phil's short sightedness and his 15 year island exile.

'You say you're having trouble seeing the future.'

"Nothing wrong with your eyesight sir: must have been a mirage you saw..."

"It's ok for you! My cartoonist just can't adapt to his new varifocals!!"

"My drone strikes are successful, Sir, but I keep getting trash talk from a 15 year old in Montana."

'The spots are much clearer.'

"Dear Bad-Karma, to assist you at this busy time, I've drawn up a list of people you may have missed."

'These online fantasy worlds are great fun. I can be ‘Dave the Accountant' from Birmingham.'

"I just got a new high-def television, but I can't enjoy it because I have low-def eyesight."

'Remember, my son -- the longest journey begins with a single slither.'

'Just think of me as your life coach.'

"I'm here for an examination, my ditzy missus thinks I may need glasses."

'I went window shopping today. I came home with four double glazed units!'