Virtuous Advisor T-Shirts

"Who are you going to listen to? Me, or the boss from hell?"

"Could you go back to the front desk? The receptionist has some forms for you to fill out."

"It's a long way to Enlightenment. You might need some cash."

'Uh, Dad - My wife thinks she and I should have a mountain of our own.'

"This Adam and Eve thing -- Is there a warranty?"

'The secret to great wealth and spiritual contentment? Ok, hold on...I think I've got an app for that..'

'God's forgiveness of sins ... is that like a spiritual bailout program?'

"'Procreate'! I've climbed all this way to hear that the meaning of life is 'procreate'?!"

'I'll be back in three or four months - Hold that thought.'

'Want to make it two out of three?'

'You're in luck. Business ethics is a gray area.'

The spirit in the wall would go on and ond, but Alvin never let it bother him.

“Just one question...how on earth do I get down?!?”

"All the celebrities come here."

"Really? a frikkin' math question?"

"I seek enlightenment - and a way to outsource our company's tech support."

'I'm afraid there is no Book of Loophole.'

Book of Life, Answers in Back.

"Pastor, may we share a message with you about humility?"

"Behold the secret to happiness."

'I was trying to extinguish my ego, and I got an Out of Memory Error.'

'Hello, Pastor Parker here. Thank you for calling moral support. Your call may be monitored to ... '

"Welcome aboard - That'll be your work station over there."

'Oh, and one more thing

'Look at you. You're a basket case.'

"If the headline screams catastrophe, but nobody cares to read it, does it still make a sound?"

'What is the meaning of poorly attended staff meetings.'

"How do I get down?"

'Oh, the guru is up on the next peak -- I'm his agent.'

A faulty part from an independent supplier leads to the creation of a multibillion-dollar sports medicine profession.

'Don't look upon me as a priest, look upon me as your personal 'After Life Coach.''