Virtual Prayer Warrior Gifts

'You didn't hear me say my prayers because I texted them.'

'Please make us instruments of Thy peace, starting with Bucky Sims.'

"... And bless my dog, Penny, whose licks give me the strength to carry on."

'Fischer Says Give Thanks to the Lord!'

"Our Rupert has swopped his gaming console for bagpipes...it gets us out of the house more often."

"I was saying a silent prayer, but I must have dozed off and talked in my sleep."

7 can't-miss prayers to insure that your team wins.

Monk Prompt

"Life is very fragile so we should handle it with 'prayer'."

"This is not what I meant when I said you needed to practice your play fighting..."

'Bless this food we are about to receive, all except the broccoli. Bless the apple pie twice.'

'I'm just going to say my prayers. Any requests?'

"Are our prayers answered whether we have an iphone or an android?"

Nun Binning the Devil

'I guess you've noticed that most of these trespasses are reruns.'

Kid praying: 'If it's okay with you, don't record this one.'

"I hope you don't mind, but I stuck in a little prayer for General Motors."

Child praying - asks god to bless his family and the new motorbike he's bought with his father's credit card.

"We're testing a new virtual reality praise & worship system for the satellite campus."

'This is the one - we want you to pray for this one.'

"What do I click on after I say 'Amen'?"

'God Bless Momma, and Daddy and Fluffy...'

Man prays: 'Lord help me to be humble, and I want that by 10am Monday.'

"My drone strikes are successful, Sir, but I keep getting trash talk from a 15 year old in Montana."

"You don't have to worry about using up your minutes."

"Say the whole prayer, none of this et cetera, et cetera..."

Gracebook.

'That's all for tonight, God. Stay tuned.'

'These online fantasy worlds are great fun. I can be ‘Dave the Accountant' from Birmingham.'

'Perhaps you need a more reverent prayer than, 'Come on, God, help me out.'

Husband to kneeling wife: 'Praying for a snow day is great, Martha, except that we live in Boca Raton.'

Young child saying grace

What brings you to therapy, Mr. Park? I'm stuck. Dr. Noodle. I'm paralyzed. I'm not making any progress. Honestly, I'm lost in the trees. I've lost sight of my goals. My health units are low. Units? Unseen enemies are everywhere. I can't sleep. I'm not eating. You're not making sense. Who am I kidding? You're right. The truth? Fine, I admit it. I can't get past level 5!!! I don't do video game counseling. If my mom loved me more, I'd be able to find more ammo.

The Force of Example.

"Yes, Mom, I'm just finishing texting my payers now!"