Vip Party-goer Gifts

The Royal Enclosure

Sloaney Pony.

"Ooh, I must sit down - I'm dead on my feet!"

"I am so attracted to you right now."

'Gosh, really? You've never been on any reality show at all?'

"I don't know anything about art, but this is a damned good Martini."

"Sir, you're not on the list - we've checked it twice."

"Tracey, this is Gene. He also read the Nancy Reagan book in unbound galleys."

"Yeah. But he's a handful."

'Not only do I have a black belt in karate, I also have a husband in the hospital to prove it!'

Redhead

Carioca

'At first I wasn't going to join, but with a name like that, how could I resist?'

'Having algorithm and having rhythm are 2 different things.'

Christmas sweater alternatives

Blue Haired Lady in Ballgown

Leo McKern

Guy dressed as an ostrich at a fancy dress party. Lump in birds throat like a real bird.

Healthcare workers come to the N.H.S. Fancy dress party dressed as viruses.

"My wife and I handle our own finances. I'm an accountant and she's a grief counselor."

"I'm terrible with names, but never fail at fingerprint, facial or voice recognition."

"I'm floating in pure vodka; feel free to dip your glass in if you'd like."

"Happy Birthday - I saw this and thought of you."

"I like them. They hate the same things we do."

"Aperitif?"

"My compliments to the sommelier."

Down on Bourbon Street...

Things to do while you're stuck at home during the coronavirus crisis.

'At that moment, across a crowded room, their thighs met.'

"...and what do you think will happen if you do attend the party?

"Teri tells me you're ostensibly straight.."

God save the Queen.

"Are you pleased to see me or is that a vuvuzela down your trousers?"

"Hi!- standards need lowering?"

'Ice cream parlour.'