Vintage Market Maven Gifts

Markets and Marketabilityby Jane Austen

The day the stock market went UP.

'The prevailing wisdom is that markets are always right. I think that luck is always right.'

'Looks like your cash cow just got diverted to the slaughterhouse.'

"It's kohlrabi, the next hot vegetable."

"Unfortunately, the consumer was not as demanding as we had hoped."

Guy has framed 'first Yuan'

"Son, you're old enough now for The Talk: everything you need to know about compound interest."

'I think I know what the problem is!'

'We're living in a round hole economy.'

Investments - Founders Bear and Bull.

European currency on the edge.

"I'm not happy about what the economists are predicting."

'When investment bankers give parental advice'

Slipping and sliding down the slope...

'Tech stocks dropped on the finding that technology isn't neccessarily the best solution to everything.'

'well of course I'm giving your portfolio the attention it deserves, I'm even wearing a black armband!'

'This is where I hang out until bullishness makes a comeback.'

Stock market Bull & Bear financial whirlwind.

"The Leonardos, the Raphaels, Titians, Veroneses, Giottos... Italy wants them back, all 427 of them."

"Like that?"

'Why can't they call it a deer, or a squirrel market?'

Enterpe, Terpsichore, Calliope, and Bernie, their agent.

A sign that reads "ART...and plenty of it!" hangs above the entrance to a museum.

'Stocks rose on the rumor that the market is mostly rumor-driven.'

Guide reading book called 'A farewell to arms.'

'We unfortunately had to compress our dinosaur area due to budget cuts. On the bright side, TyrannoTriStegoApatoHadroPlesioSaurodon Rex here is now the museum's most popular exhibit.'

'Time to buy.'

'I suppose you think that's funny.'

"I was downgraded to junk status at work today."

'According to our fact finding committee, our stock won't be worth a dime this quarter.'

"In my next album 'Gettin' Back', I refute all the strong beliefs expressed in 'Gettin' There', my previous album."

'In memory of our beloved Skippy.'

'We have to go global since nobody around here will buy our product.'

"Basically it makes the same mistakes we've always made - but it makes tham so much faster!"