Vino Ventilator T-Shirts

'We don't 'skimp' on the pour, sir; we're just generous with the glass.'

Cats are under tremendous peer pressure to remain useless.

Redhead

"Wow! You do have a triple A membership!"

“I’m stayin’ home — I want the world to know — I pro-bab-ly won’t go!”

I'm getting an ample full taste... I'm getting whimsical... I'm getting 'red'

'Don't worry boss, it's probably archaic!'

"Rats, I thought he'd like my science project!"

House proud woman vacuums hair from dog.

'Ladies no more messy pet hairs to worry about with the Decko Dynamic!'

'Your husband started without me, didn't he?'

"I wonder what this was for."

"I've just overheard the doctor say the farmer has the flu! We all know what that means: chicken soup!"

'Hello, Ma'am. I'm a college graduate selling vacuum cleaners door to door to help pay for the fortune I borrowed to take a course that had nothing to do with selling vacuums... and how are you doing?'

'That's why I like Neederman. He does the little things to help his team that don't show up in the statistics.'

"And would you like a wine stopper?"

"Me, I love vacuuming: it makes the dog next door barking mad! Works every time..."

'Oh, sow some interest! How many 8-year-olds can play the '1812' on a vacuum hose?'

Colin attempts to be useful around the house didn't always have the desired effect.

"I need a box of the gayest chocolate you've got."

'It's got worse than just the occasional sploosh from a wine box, hasn't it?'

Mammoth hoover

Rich Man with Lawn Mower followed by Maid with Hoover.

"When we talked on the phone I never said that I was a non-drinking man! I said a one-drink man!"

Woman in swimsuit vacuuming the lawn.

'While 10-15 years of cellaring are recommended and would certainly improve the bouquet and taste, no, there'sno reason why you can't go out back, behind the dumpster and down the whole thing in 1 chug.'

Covid Boarding Pass

Mother of teenage boy vacuuming up music.

Human Dust Buster

Born To Raise Dirt

The hazards of Cleaning a Magic Carpet

"It's trouble for Chubby when Mitzi brings out the vacuum."

"That's the finest vacuum cleaner you've ever designed."