Viking History Buffs Gifts

" ... and if we finish pillaging early enough, we can still catch the evening Zumba class on the after deck."

The Ferocious Viking Wiener Dog

More Reasons To Beware Of Dog

'The new lad's collecting shells again boss.'

"Can Olaf come out to pillage and plunder?"

'The siege is working my lord. They have food and water but no beard oil. I reckon they will surrender in 12 hours or less'

'Too late...looks like they've already been pillaged.'

With Thorssen, it's "Pillage and blunder".

"He just found that 'pillage' rhymes with 'village'."

"I'd heard that Farnsworth had a difficult secretary to get past."

'A message from the Vikings, sire. It says, 'we've got spirit! Yes, we do! We've got spirit! How about you!?'

'I miss the good old days!'

Bubble; 'This castle manager job better be for real.'

Viking sitting patiently while his wife winds her wool on his helmets horns to sort it out.

"Hey team, meet our new V.P. of acquisitions and mergers." (businessman introducing a vicking, barbarian)

"But I use all of them!"

"And I suppose you forgot to bring home the milk."

"There's always a period of adjustment whenever you hire a new crew."

"And so if the pillage numbers don't improve this quarter, I have just one word for you: waterskis."

'If all your friends were looting and pillaging, would you do it, too?'

'Thank goodness he's gone through sensitivity training.'

'Raping and pillaging, Seniors' Tour, 898AD.'

Stabbing an opera singer to hit the high notes.

Sif instantly regretted asking Thor to hang the picture.

"I don't care if you are on full alert, take that silly hat off before you tear the pillows to shreds!"

Gaah! You sank my longship!

"How the heck could you forget your sword?"

'Could you give us a push?'

"Magnus! How many times must I tell you...Skulls of your enemies go on the top rack!!!"

"Do you think the world really is going to hell, or are we just getting old?"

"Looting and plundering! Looting and plundering! There must be more to life!...."

"Connect A2 to B3, insert D3 into E5....I hate flat packs!"

Viking in the dock: His barrister says: 'Your honour, my client was simply expanding his business interests. We object to the use of the word 'pillaging'.'

Viking River Raids

Really Early Vikings