Vice Conqueror Pillows

'My husband has given up drinking and smoking so I like to meet him at the bus to comfort him.'

'You should have taken up the game earlier.'

Woman forcing family to hike through hills.

"I love fast break business success."

Squash Courts - "Insurance anyone"

'That last hill was a bit steep!'

"Congratulations, Figbert. I'm making you Vice President in charge of my wife's Honey-Do-List."

Firefigher arm-wrestling with a dragon.

' I see Brad's playing his new video game again.'

'I was all ready to deal with the military, but I never expected an IRS coup!'

'I read that the ball is on the surface of the club for just 0.00035 of a second, so even when you take 100 shots to go around, you are only getting less than 1 second of golf for your money...'

"...and how do you feel about being labelled the new Great British hope?"

'Great putt. Lucky I hit the pin.'

Golf Myths - The Perfect Game.

"I ran out of answers before she ran out of questions."

'The pro said my swing was out of this world.'

'It's the word MODERATE which scares me!'

"How do you respond to critics who say you only play the backcourt?"

Speleologist

Cricket.

Learning to deal with road rage is really hard when the stupid therapist keeps cutting you off.

The Conquest

It appeals to pride,greed,lust, sloth and envy, but we're overlooking gluttony and avarice.'

"With my handicap I can park just about anywhere I want to!"

Kid rage.

"These will make you feel like a kid again... especially when you can't remove the child-proof cap!"

'Drat, another hole-in-one. Pity really - I was looking forward to some putting practice.'

Old man with a zimmer frame grittier