Vet School Faculty Pillows

'Dean, we've been looking over your plans and curriculum...'

"I'm beginning to think that buy one, get one free is not always a good thing."

"I offer emotional support and companionship for those with PTSD." "I detect cancer and other human diseases by scent detection." "I squeak-fart when startled."

Cat Scan

"Satisfaction, stat!"

'We call these supernumerary teats!'

"What we have here is a severe case of over-growing."

'Eloise! Come back! I was just going to show you some of the equipment we use in veterinary school...'

'Being a brilliant,inspiring teacher is NOT adequate, Hackwell....'

"You want a second opinion,,,You're an idiot,"

"We're just going for a routine checkup ... they only do that operation once."

'No need to shout.'

'So what if he goes crazy now and then. Cats also have nine minds.'

"I know I said, 'If there's anything I can do,' but I draw the line on licking your incision for you."

"It's mouseborn."

'Well, it's kind of an IV enema!'

"So then in comes this good-looking French vet from Vétérinaires sans Frontirères."

'You want to stick that thermometer where?'

"Hey, don't complain. They declawed me!"

"Your test results are in. You've got Irritable Growl Syndrome."

"Inside you there are two wolves..."

Grumpy Hamster

Bovine Proctology Graduation

Dog leaving operating theatre in a hurry with a bone in his mouth

'Aren't you glad we gave her a rabies vaccination this year?'

"These dizzy spells, I have a theory."

'Here, takes these...we're going to need a urine sample from him right now.'

'The increasing popularity of the Saint Bernard...'

'Ear mites!!!'

"He's a hypochondriac."

Hamster IV

'Doctor, why do you keep saying 'Whoa' to my dog?'

'He needs counselling . . . he wants to be a vet.'