Vet Bill Dodger Pillows

'Wait...Sir...It's customary to pay for services when rendered!'

"No luggage to check - I just have this carry on."

"How sweet, your hand is trembling."

'He's kind of a rescue dog. He points to where the hardest work is, so that I can run into the opposite direction!'

Nun Binning the Devil

'Why is it always me that has to put the cat out?'

'You know, this is a pretty dangerous line of work you're in...'

"What kind of 'best friend' expects you to pick up their sh*t?"

Minefield! Thank you for treading carefully.

Gentlemen, I'm off to join the circus

Election Cancelling Headphones

'Making a To-Do List is on my Bucket List.'

'Can you give me a few minutes, Waiter? I can't run on a full stomach.'

The Demon's Disguise

'Forget 'forsaking all others', you can have the week off' (housewife to husband).

We'll pass on the entrees...

'Mr. big shot scientist who works 18 hours a day at a prestigious lab developing high strength corrosion inhibitors, but can I get him to spend 2 minutes getting rust stains out of our own tub? No.'

"Yeah, almost didn't make it out of that one."

You are here... ...Run!!!

A $50 co-pay? Well, go find someone named 'Co' and maybe they can pay you."

Winter depression.

"Move over! - I just got the bill!"

'Now I know why they call you Cinderella... You're always running away from the ball.'

Cycling Deaths

"Dora's anxiety has always manifested itself in the 'flight response.'"

'After a close examination I think I know why Tabatha keeps wandering onto busy roads.'

"You recused yourself from this case. I recuse myself from jury duty."

"If this meeting becomes too heated, we'll create a distraction...like running out the door."

'I know my electric bills are way over due, but could you at least wait until March Madness is over before turning off my electricity?'

"I thought all the bills we were going to ignore were coming electronically."

A 3D TV distracts as a truck crashes through a wall.

'Great news! Your father's got a job.'

"Bad news...you don't have a deadly disease. You've got to go back to work."

'One minute she was eyeing her hospital bill, and the next minute...'

'Now you're out of order!!'