Vegetable Patch Planner Pillows

'My garden won't feed the family, but it'll feed a pretty nice rabbit stew.'

Gardeners with Different Sized Greenhouse.

Maybe I should have measured my garden before going shopping....

Planting seeds in garden - broad beans and jelly beans.

"I'm rooting for the carrots."

'You certainly went to town growing all that lettuce so I've dressed for dinner.'

'These spare Christmas decorations make perfect bird scarers.'

'You've never planted potatoes before have you?'

"Must've planted those seeds upside down..."

"Why don't other people ever do this?"

He was forced to take early retirement.

Dreams of Spring...

I've got lettuce, snow peas and radishes planted. Seeds. Next I'll plant beans, zucchini, leeks and chard. Plus tomatoes and basil. A lot of work for stuff no one wants to eat.

The Confused Gardener

'I tried to tell him I didn't think it was a tomato.'

"Can you believe we walked right past security?"

"Leftover seeds."

A Gardener's Calendar: January - This is the most convenient time to work out your plans for the year.

"If you don't have time to take care of everything, Sir, Mom's vegetable garden would be a good thing to let go."

'Are these carrots organically grown?'

Dreaming of Spring (Onslaught of the garden catalogs).

"Janet and Bob are coming to dinner on October 6th. Better plant eight more carrots and three more potatoes this spring."

Pumpkin Sales

"He finds this time of year very stressful."

Rite of Spring.

"You forgot to record what you planted, didn't you?"

The cost of home grown vegetables

'You're a real cabbage patch doll! Lettuce introduce ourselves!'

'Have you lost the plot?'

Husband planing to place sedative herbs in the herbarium of his wife's lover

'I never used to like brussels sprouts, but they're growing on me!'

'It's the LAST time I volunteer to organise the staff Christmas meal, I've spent three days trying to find a 'traditional' lacto-vegan Christmas menu.'

ducks embarrassing a gardener

Gardening for Beginners - 'Hot water or cold?'

'OK, it will be a complex hunt tonight: Let's synchronize our watches...'