Vegetable Aroma Detective T-Shirts

'Must be autumn, I can smell leaves burning.' - 'No, I'm cooking cabbage.'

Honest Vending

"Dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, dirt, onion bagel with Nutella and cream cheese, dirt, dirt, dirt..."

'Six different chefs in six months and they still can't make a decent broth!'

'That strange smell, George.. is FRESH AIR!'

"Good news. It wasn't a toxic chemical leak. It was an old pizza in your kid's room."

"Mother! How? Wait — where’s Dad?!"

'Is that the smell of fear? Or is it just Meatloaf Monday in the cafeteria?'

"My God!!..Just how long have we had this Broccoli hiding in the back of the fridge?"

I'm getting an ample full taste... I'm getting whimsical... I'm getting 'red'

The Huge-Underground Vat theory of why all wonton soup tastes exactly the same.

'True it does have small flowers but through the microscope its exquisite.'

Getting Rid of the Cure

"Ah — excellent catsup."

'Turn right at the Robinia pseudoacacia, pass the garden with the salvia officinalis, cross the road when you see the stranvaesia davidinia and the pub is on the left!'

"Don't try the candied yams and sweet peas, turns out they are vegetables."

'It's nice to meet you Otto. Your scent precedes you.'

"There's a house-plant round here somewhere."

Woman disposes of partner's squash kit in hazardous waste container.

'First Lady Lettuce goes missing...'

'Just between you and me, Mrs Frobish, how'd you like the lowdown on what's really in knockwurst?'

'I say we back off: I can't smell fear at all...'

"Uh-oh,...she smells another dog in my portfolio..."

Do they have to grow frozen vegetables in the winter?

"Good boy Alex! You've eaten all your vegetables again."

Barristers wearing clothes pegs to overcome a bad smell

"I ask you, how can something so cute and soft smell like a bag of Fritos?"

'I'd like a second opinion. Something about this guy just doesn't smell right.'

"Is that Penny I smell? It's been so long... Hold on, is this Dougie? No way! That crazy mongrel, he is nuts! I remember that time he chased those kids on skateboards all the way down Cliff Street. Wait, is this Rosie?!"

'Ha! I knew they were just little trees!'

'This stuff isn't genetically engineered, is it?'

'Heaven welcomes botanists, we've millions of extinct plants that need classifying!'

"OK...not taking a shower is not an option for teenage boys!"

That elusive Pecorino!

"I'm poison oak. I'm pretty sure I'm poison oak.... Or is that poison oak?"