Vegan Dilemma Lover Pillows

"I'm a vegan. I don't know what made me order a cheeseburger. Maybe I've got the flesh eating disease."

"Mom, I'm at work – let me call you back after I finish stocking milk for wealthy vegans who like beet juice in their meat alternatives so they can still get that bloody effect when cooking without guilt."

Who should be the next eco-club president? The most vegan? The most carbon neutral? The most into solar? Eco-club. But we need someone who will attract kids to the environmental cause. Then it's obvious. The most popular. Or most athletic!

What's In Her Bag? Coachella Edition!

"At first glance this diet might seem boring but then you realize there are actually seven varieties of kale!"

"I can't go much longer without your asking why I'm vegan."

"Statins. I got statins. Who needs statins?"

'Rob is a vegan.'

"Dig in. It's a medallion-of-veal look-alike."

'It's the LAST time I volunteer to organise the staff Christmas meal, I've spent three days trying to find a 'traditional' lacto-vegan Christmas menu.'

'Smile and say: tofu-based dairy substitute.'

The nutritional devils and angels on your shoulder.

It' complications galore for Sparky when easy-to-assemble instructions are read upside down.

'Two all beef patties, special sauce, lettuce, cheese, pickles, onions, on a sesame seed bun.'

"Repeat after me... We are vegan... We are vegan..."

No Dogs Allowed

'Now you tell me you've gone vegan?'

'It's your lucky day. I just went vegan.'

'You know, I just got a sudden yen for nuts and berries.'

"This place has the best vegan nachos!"

"As a vegan vampire I suck but I don't swallow."

"Cool, I've never met a vegan flamingo before."

'Not only do you get out of cooking tonight, but you found a place with a lazy chef too.'

"Everyone, stop looking delicious. The vegans are back and that tofurkey jerky won't keep them back much longer."

Tofu bi-products.

After rescue from Treasure Island, Benn Gunn returned to his wife, Mary, a strict vegan.

"A Mister 'Ty Gurr' wants to reserve a table next to our fattest customer."

What to serve to meet most dietary restrictions

"I work out so I don't have to eat kale."

Vegan Cat

"I'm only eating vegans now and honestly, I feel so much healthier."

'well, then, I guess you're also lactose substitute intolerant.'

'That's cute. You're a Virgo and I'm a vegetarian.'

Humpty Dumpty replaced by egg substitute.

"Do you have such a thing as low calorie caramel coffee creams?"