Vanity Connoisseur T-Shirts

"Your hair dryer still stuck on 'high'?"

'He wants to look slightly mysterious and menacing.'

"You're so vein."

"Botox! Botox!!!"

"I groom all day and still look like a baboon."

"Can you make wishes on fake eyelashes?"

"Whoa. Jeff. Looks like you got that job at the cosmetic testing lab."

"I can never get my sunglasses on my head the way my hairdresser does"

"Too much concealer?"

Man admiring his patterned clothes in the mirror

'Mirror, mirror, on the wall, who is the fairest algologist of all?'

'Maybe a helium boob job wasn't such a good idea,babe!'

"Do you have any of that after shave that makes me look like Brad Pitt?"

'Don't all look at me like that! What did you expect the face pack to do for me?'

Insecurities of the Bald Eagle.

'Of course she hasn't aged a bit. She's married to a plastic surgeon!'

'I washed the gray right out of my hair, but now I can't get the gray out of my tub.'

'You certainly lived a remarkable life. Any chance you'll get over yourself?'

'Still workin' on the beard, Jerry?'

"We're the same age, but you look great! What's your secret?"

'Here's my fail proof way to restore a youthful appearance - a 30 watt bulb.'

"How are the new lips feeling babe?"

"I had a consultation with a plastic surgeon. Now I have to decide whether I want to look old or look weird."

'You're on Deck! Wilson! Hurry up with that pedicure!'

Vanity artist

"No threat detected. Their vast resources are spent on lasers that combat wrinkles and unwanted hair."

TV-Mirror.

Man brushing the teeth of his reflection.

WC problem.

'I can't see anything through these ridiculous tiny slits, I'll take them.'

'Mommy puts on a disguise every time, before she goes to work.'

"...And please let at least one person admire my new hat!"

Krest Yellow Strips. (Rat performs dental hygiene.)

"...and we plan to offer it as a scarce and valuable product."

"Look at me, everyone! I'm amazing!"