Vampire Narrators T-Shirts

'You know better than to play with wooden stakes!'

Vlad the Impala

Dracula acquires a taste for maple syrup.

"Are you willing to work the night shift?"

Vampire coming out of a body piercing shop with a stake in his heart

"What do you mean you're tired of AB negative?"

"Dangnabit, Wilson! Where's that big campfire I asked for?"

"I'm getting plasma, iron and platelets. RH positive!"

Vampire baby in 'Grav-co' stroller.

"This mask is a bit of a passion killer. . . !"

Death Styles of the Rich and Famous

Naming that Impala

Visual Gag: Dracula reading a Fang Shui book. The Vampires version of 'Feng' Shui

'And this is scraps.'

First Transsylvanian Blood Bank

'I'm quite impressed with your bloodthirstiness but we won't be able to offer you health benefits eternally.'

"Can any of us truly see ourselves?"

Little Van Helsing was dissapointed that, again, there was no monster under the bed or in the closet.

'At last, dusk...and my e-mails!'

"Look, we're three thousand years old. No one's going to hire us."

Professor Van Helsing's long and successful career as a vampire hunter, came to a sudden end due to woodworm.

Finally - Prof. Brozinski found the vegetarian vampire! And he knew what to do...

Fresh Blood In Politics

"How come Dracula's hair looked so neat if he can't look in a mirror"

"They're remaking the old 'Dracula' film again..."

"You've been grinding your fangs."

And where do you think you may have come in contact with AIDS tainted blood?

'You don't look anything like Count Dracula and I should know, because he's a personal friend of mine.'

Vampires Into Stem Cells.

Can't Count Dracula

'Dracula's First Day of School.'

Vampire Weekday

Nosferatu-D2