Vampire Fiction Writer T-Shirts

"Are you willing to work the night shift?"

Transylvanian backpackers.

'Hello? Missing Persons?'

Don't be fooled by the theatrics. She'll only suck your sap!

Vlad the Impala

'... And this is my cellar.'

One vampire tricks another behind a mirror.

A vampire sitting on a park bench at night feeding bats.

A vampire in a canoe.

You're dead to me, Marsha. And that's just the way I like it."

He looks so natural lying there...

'Don't worry, you're safe. I started my diet today.'

'Well, now we know why Dracula's been getting all the girls lately.'

"Bram Stoker's Bambi"

"Son, you can't get blood from a turnip!"

Dracula acquires a taste for maple syrup.

'I know how much you like holding hands, so I brought you a box of them..'

"Who'd have thought old Harry would turn out to be a vampire?"

Get on with it!

'Transylvania's most famous Optometrist 'Count Mracula'.'

'I need a sun cream with a very high protection factor.'

"The guide book sys it's the best B.&B. in the Carpathians."

How to fight a vampire snowman

"I know. But I think I can change him."

Vampire on a plane

"Don't be a sentimental fool, Harker!"

"I'm getting plasma, iron and platelets. RH positive!"

Fancy a pint?

"Take my word for it, sir―it looks just great on you!"

"I had a Caesar salad for lunch, but that was two days ago."

'Seriously Vicar, I do not think you have seen this guy in the morning service!'

"There's a loose string on your sweater, dear, but I'm afraid to pull it."

Vampire collects bottles of blood from his doorstep.

'I don't know who you are stranger, but if you mess with big Gus you'll be in your coffin by dawn!'