Valentine's Day Rebel T-Shirts

'If cupid shot me with his arrow this week, it would bounce right off!'

'I booked a table for one under the name of Narcissus.'

"Lassie, go get help!" "Oh Timmy you idiot! Not again!"

Shepherd and eurydice

'I sent out for everything.'

"I was with you right up to the cumin."

Playing Fetch.

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

You're my Mona Lisa.

"Together ideas for couples" "Slap a sandwich together" "Put two and two together" "Pull themselves together" "Rub two sticks together" "Try to hold it together" "String a phrase together"

Sure, he's a zombie but hey, it's nice to finally meet someone who is more interested in my brains than my body.

'Past performance is not an indication of future results.'

'So let me see if I've got it straight. It was a very large squirrel and your husband is a nut.'

"Stephen and I are today's special."

"Now, were those friends of your Gettys or Gottis?"

LAY ZEE FUK

"We have three house blends: 'One More Chance', 'Forget About It' or 'I'll See You In Fun Court'."

The Ray Bradbury classic, 'The Car Alarm.'

"Where else in the world would you get such wonderful sunsets?"

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "

Men find this shampoo irresistible. It's called 'Gee, Your Hair Smells Like A New Car'.

Lesbian civil partnership.

'Honey, I wish you wouldn't bring your work home with you!'

'Darling I want you to remember this always,,,'

'Do you think we can cuddle?'

When Ted and Nancy would dance, it was as if they were the only couple on the floor....

Men's Suits. I hear being suave and sophisticated is coming back in style. That's just an urbane legend.

"My emotional support dog ate my comfort food."

"May I have this arythmic flail?"

"What's that? I asked for a teal lichen. That's a brown thread. Are you trying to upset me?"

'I'll have the crab cake, and he'll have the crabby cake.'

'Maybe we should have gone for a pommel horse.'

Love at First Sight

Life is for the birds.

"And I'll also take my steak raw thank you."