Utility Bill Strategist Gifts

Catsulation

'Our water bill is more than we spent on our vacation because you again left the toilet running the whole time we were away.'

Energy bills rise

'I know it's a constant drain of electricity, but I rationalize that it also functions as a night light.'

High electricity consumption in the summer

The Solar System (after deregulation)

Your energy bill is enclosed. You might want to sit down.

'I hate playing in an inflatable dome during a power outage.'

"We can probably just about afford to run the pilot-light."

'This one's called 'unpaid electric bills'.'

"He's refusing to pay the inflationary bits"

"It's a ransom note from our energy supplier!"

'If you can't beat 'em join 'em.'

Gas Bill

'I quit drinking coffee with lunch - it was keeping me awake all afternoon.'

Dr Jekyll/Mr Hyde gets his gas bill.

Hotel: Price List

"Please tell me it's a local call..."

Electric Rate Hikers: ZZZZZT!

'OK, it's your turn to stand by the pilot light.'

Cartoonist's tax return

"This is your energy supplier. . . We're all on holiday in Bermuda at the moment - but leave a message and we might get back to you. . ."

"Where should we put the newly repaired gas turbine engine, Mr Putin?"

"We won't depend on Russian oil!"

As the earth's temperature rises, shouldn't my heating bill fall?

Yorkshire Water - "Time to take a leak Gentlemen ?"

"Hello sir - I'm from your energy supplier. . ."

"We made three billion dollars mining Bitcoin, minus our electricity bill - that comes to $1.61."

TASERS...With the cost of electricity we could only afford 50 volts.

'Thank you, Vladimir.'

"Hi! This is your energy provider - all our operatives are out on a spending spree at the moment - please try again later."

"Due to the high electricity price, you'll have to pay a 25 bucks deductible. As you will understand, I'd like to have it in advance."

Energy Privatisation

'We forgot to pay the phone bill.'

I received an incorrect bill because the electric company didn't send a meter reader to my house. Unchecked power can cause problems.