Urban Warriors T-Shirts

Parking? I don't think so.

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

Hello, my name is riskyy@ronny5 and I am addicted to comments boards.

City Marathon.

Commutobile

"So I'm perfectly healthy? That's good but will I still be able to research symptoms online and panic?"

Spammatic blaster - gun to shoot pop-up ads.

'This is Martins, the office I was telling you about. She's got a real knack for texting people down from window ledges!'

"This city is becoming unlivable."

Run, Mike, Run!

Wake the eff up with the official New York City alarm clock. Choose your distress signal: car horns, sirens, barking, heat pipes, mouse feet. Guaranteed to disturb!

Boston Marathon: The First Responders.

'I have the MRI scan of your brain. The right hemisphere is clogged with computer passwords.'

'I'm looking for a toothpaste that combats Tokyo, Kansas city and Suburban Portland along the gum line.'

"Prepare to meet thy blower."

Nun confronts mugger.

'Hey, Birdbrain, does the word ozone mean anything to you?'

Water shortage and waste due to leaks

"I hate when a parking spot in the city opens up."

"It was $78 but that was when you started filling, it's $96 Now."

"We understand you're not happy with our privacy policy."

Urban Expansion

'Wow, that shift almost got us.'

"I think it's the road to Stressville...."

Gas Bill

"We don't need a digital security guard. Hackers don't actually come to our house."

"Zero to 60 in 4 seconds. Think of it! You'll be the fastest guy to the next red light!"

Pardon our dust as we continue to remodel every square inch of planet Earth!

'I'm pleased to announce the newly-created 'Office of Homepage Security' - to protect against computer hackers.'

"My neighborhood is getting too noisy. Traffic, screaming kids, barking dogs … I'm used to living in quiet desperation."

"Whatever the politicians might decide, I'm well prepared because I've got enough hate comments for the next five years!"

'What SPF do you use?'

"Great! Now I'm torn between whether to post rants on X or Meta."