Urban Conversationist T-Shirts

"Is it wrong for me to want to vote?"

"Don't even interact with him. He just likes to say 'Kalamazoo.'"

"Could I ask just one question?"

"Who knew we had so many dislikes in common?"

"It's no good, Bertie—we must either find some other place to meet or break off the affair altogether."

" I'm sorry. I was so busy listening to myself talk that I forgot what I was saying."

"Isn't us talking about how I would never take a ballroom dancing class an activity we're doing together?"

"You can't offend me. I never mix religion or politics with reality."

"I should warn you that many of John's thoughts are subliminal."

"I'm just so relieved! I thought you didn't love me anymore, but now I realize I was just projecting!!"

Attention Span Man

"I don'y know about you guys, but I don't feel like I've lost one goddamn bit of my feminity."

Big Talk/Small Talk.

'I leave a few spaces so you can get a few words in edgeways.'

"I used to waste a lot of time explaining myself to family, friends and shrinks. Now I only explain myself to Rick."

"I'm going to read a statement and then I'll take questions.''

'No, he didn't have any last words,his wife was in there and she did all of the talking right up to the end.'

'What do you mean I've wolfed that down? You've never stopped nattering!'

"The Doctor is just wonderful!! He listens to all my irrelevant, boring stories!"

"I worry about every little thing. Barry's more of a generalist."

'I'm tired of all the small talk.'

"When you say you love your life, should I be happy for you?"

"Everybody's just a teensy bit in love with me. How about yourself?"

"This next one's a sad little number I call, 'I left my guitar on the F train.'"

"You might be poor and ugly but you're the only one who didn't blather about politics and climate change after ten minutes. What's your name? Marry me!"

"You're not even listening!"

"Hey, keep it down, we're trying to have a conversation."

'It's going to be harder to get back than you think. We're now part of a subculture of a counter culture.'

'I didn't know our relationship was SUPPOSED to be going anywhere.'

"I'll tell you what ... you mingle, I'm going to monopolize a conversation."

"Is it wrong that I miss the dog more than the kids?"

I've always wanted to be enigmatic but I talk too much.

"We're still negotiating. I want a six-figure starting salary and they don't want to hire me."

"Do you think of yourself as a spiritual person?"