University Party T-Shirts

Big Fish Little Fish Cardboard Box.

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

'No standing while room is in motion.'

C'mon, it'll be fun! I'll throw on some stars, pop in a few planets, drum up a life form or two, and this place will be hoppin'! The Big Shebang Theory.

'I like you, you remind me of someone.'

Beers

Shaken not stirred

My belief is if you're old enough to take texts, counter-texts, and meta-texts in Western Philosophy, you should be old enough to drink.

Balancing two espresso martinis

"I am so attracted to you right now."

Karataoke

'Ron's not drunk - he's pouting because we won't play Pictionary.'

"Always with the String Theory."

Cut out and keep your own DJ.

"Come to our microbrew party Saturday. It's B.Y.O.B. — Bring Your Own Brewery."

"Honey, I think that's too many bows."

'We're the first film ever in HD 3-D DOUBLE D!'

"Whine and cheezed party."

'You have failed on all counts...'

'Inside Ralph is a comedienne crying to get out.'

Yahoo! What's that about? She got into the college of her choice. Which college is it? Not sure. She chose to apply to 37. West Fester High School.

"I write mostly confessional non-fiction."

Whale Piñata.

"Why can't you ever relax at parties?"

"Ugh, I was afraid he'd be here."

Join me in a Caiprinha!

"Congratulations Professor, the committee 'okayed' your grant request."

"You know, you're really cool – we should hang out sometime."

'I've heard all about you. Jayne says you're quite the prankster.'

Pinata Zombies

Angry wife: 'Oh well DONE Keith! Why didn't you tell me the invite said BRING your own spirits?!'

"...and what do you think will happen if you do attend the party?

"And before leaving virtual class today be sure and hit that like button!"

"I'm not going to shoot the messenger, but I'm also not going to renew his grant."

Join me in a beer?