Universal Adventurer Pillows

Round-the-world cyclist has world stolen

"It's a postmodern mosaic, almost lyrical in its undercurrent." "My five-year-old will be happy to hear that."

High-gravity baseball

"In my life, I've had seven cars, six jobs, five houses, four bypass operations, and three wives!"

"Pokemon...Pokemon...Pokemon...."

Easter Island is still a tourist site after the oceans rise due to global warming.

i-teddy

"I knew we should have gotten the shorter tree."

"He is walking from 'Lands end to John'o'Groats', virtually."

"I don't care if it's a boy or a girl, as long as it's undead."

"What are you talking about? We don’t even have a toilet seat!"

"If I survive this holiday, I'm moving to a pond."

"My husband's the academic. I just like to travel. I'm more of a pandemic."

Guide fish.

"I've diligently spent the last eight hours saving an entire colony of elves from a pack of vicious dragons and your only concern is that it is 2 am?"

"All I ask is a chance to ruin my life in my own way."

Octopus on Keys.

Airplane Fish

'Now, you can SWASH, and you can BUCKLE, but you can't SWASHBUCKLE.'

'As you can see, nothing up my sleeves...'

'I'm not sure my heart could take the excitement.'

'And so you can imagine our surprise when we discovered our hall closet was the gateway to hell!'

Gwendolyn found herself deep in the Lake district,

"Just our luck. We finalyy conquer space travel only to be consumed by a wormhole."

'Turn we women loose in the malls - that'll stimulate the economy.'

"Miles... I'm going abstract!"

"Apparently, if you understand it, you don’t understand it."

Happy Valentine's Day.

At the Penguin fishing school: 'Gunvald has set the bar kind of high, gang!'

Great Moments in History: The Birth of Evolution

Spiritual Show Observed by the Grim Reaper.

'There's more than one kind of deficit.'

'We'll have lunch here and then we'll keep looking for whales.'

Scuba diver in shark's water cooler.

'And this war game comes with an AK 47.'